Why Do I Feel Tired Around My Girlfriend? You Asked, SBL Answered!

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Hey there Soul Bonding Love, I’m reaching out because, to be honest, I’ve been going through something kinda weird and I don’t really know who to talk about it with. So here goes: I’ve been feeling super drained whenever I’m around my girlfriend lately, and man, it’s just messing with my head. We’ve been together for nearly two years now and at first, everything was honestly like a fairy tale. We’d stay up all night just talking about everything and nothing. We couldn’t get enough of each other; it was electric! But these last few months… something’s shifted, and I can’t put my finger on it. Whenever she’s around now, it’s like my energy levels just drop through the floor. It feels like she has this ability to suck the life right out of me without even doing anything? And don’t get me wrong, nothing major has changed—she hasn’t turned into some kind of monster or anything. She’s the same girl I fell for… but something’s off. The other day we were just sitting on the couch binge-watching our favorite series – which used to be “our thing” – but halfway through the second episode, I felt so tired I could barely keep my eyes open. This fatigue only happens with her though; when I’m at work or hanging out with friends or even alone, my energy is totally normal. Like yesterday, we met up for lunch during the workday cause her office is close to mine – which was pretty standard for us before – but after she left, going back to work felt like a Herculean task! And her text messages… man they used to light up my day! Now every beep feels like a chore because I know responding will drain what little juice I have left. I love her and when we’re apart this doesn’t happen – which makes zero sense! It’s making me question our entire connection cause isn’t being with your partner meant to uplift you rather than drag you down? There’s gotta be an explanation beyond “we’ve hit the comfortable stage,” right? Cause comfortable shouldn’t equal exhausted 24/7 when she’s around. Is it me? Is this some weird phase that couples go through? Or is there something deeper here that needs addressing? Any advice on how to deal with this or where this sudden energy vampire thing might be coming from would be massively appreciated! Thanks, DrainedDude

The Raw And Honest Truth I Would Give To My Friends Or Family Member…

Hey DrainedDude, The thing to point out here is, it’s normal for relationships to go through different stages. The initial “honeymoon phase” characterized by intense passion and excitement gives way to a more comfortable, less thrilling stage. It’s part of the process of truly getting to know each other. But let’s get this straight, comfortable shouldn’t equate to exhaustion.
Here’s what I’ll say: Pay attention to your feelings, because they’re telling you something important. Your body and mind have a way of letting you know when things aren’t right. This sudden exhaustion you’re experiencing around your girlfriend could possibly be an emotional response rather than a physical one.
Maybe you two have some unresolved issues that are taking a toll on you subconsciously. Or perhaps you’re picking up on some vibes from her that are triggering this reaction — maybe she’s going through something herself and it’s impacting you too.
The first step is open communication. Talk to your girlfriend about how you’re feeling. Approach the topic gently; remember, it’s about sharing your feelings, not accusing her of anything. There may be something she’s experiencing that she hasn’t shared with you, or it could lead to a discussion about aspects of your relationship that need improvement.
Don’t let fear of uncomfortable conversations prevent honesty in your relationship. It may turn out to be a revealing conversation for both of you.
Self-reflection is also crucial. Are there any patterns from past relationships resurfacing? Any personal issues that might be influencing your feelings? Sometimes, our minds link past experiences with current situations subconsciously leading to unexpected reactions.
Also consider seeking professional help. If this continues, it might be a good idea to see a therapist or counselor, individually or as a couple. They can provide tools and strategies to navigate through these complex feelings.
Lastly, remember to take care of yourself. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep, eating well, and taking time to relax and do things that you enjoy. Self-care is not selfish; it’s necessary.
Remember, love should make you feel good and enhance your life, not drain the life out of you. You deserve to be in a relationship that brings joy, comfort, and energy into your life.
Good luck, A Friend
But, that’s just my personal viewpoint. I’ve asked an expert relationship coach to break it down for what it is.
It might provide you with some more context.

“why do i feel tired around my girlfriend”: Advice From A Relationship Coach

Let’s break this down, shall we? Feeling tired around your girlfriend can be a bit of a head-scratcher, especially when you’re supposed to feel energized by the company of someone you care about. But here’s the thing – relationships are complex, and how you feel within them can be influenced by a myriad of factors. Emotional Labor: The Hidden Energy Drain
Okay, so what this actually means is that you could be experiencing something called emotional labor. This is when one person in the relationship is carrying more than their fair share of emotional work – like always being the one to initiate conversations, make plans, or manage conflicts. It’s like being a relationship manager on top of your day job! If this rings true for you, it might be time to have an open chat with your girlfriend about rebalancing these scales. The Impact of Stress and Lifestyle
Could it be that external stressors are actually at play here? Sometimes our bodies and minds react in fatigue when we’re facing underlying issues outside the relationship. Work stress, family pressure, or even personal health concerns – they all take a toll and can leave us feeling drained even in good company. Compatibility Check: Are You Really A Perfect Match?
When we talk about compatibility, it’s not just shared interests and making each other laugh; it’s also about energy levels aligning. If your girlfriend is perhaps more extroverted than you are or has higher energy needs for social interaction than you do naturally provide, that mismatch could explain why time spent together might exhaust rather than invigorate. Communication Styles: The Unseen Battle
Another point to consider is communication style differences. If your girlfriend communicates differently (say she’s more direct and you’re more reflective), interactions may require more mental gymnastics on your part as you try to keep pace or decode meanings. Recognizing these differences can help in finding a middle ground where both partners can interact comfortably. Quality Time vs. Quantity Time
What if it’s not about how much time but rather how that time is spent? Reflect on the activities that constitute your together-time. Are they mostly energy-zapping for one party? Maybe there’s need for rethinking what meaningful quality time looks like for both of you. The Need for Personal Space: It’s Healthy!
It’s essential to mention personal space too – yes, even in relationships! Being with someone non-stop without adequate ‘me-time’ can make anyone feel worn out. Balance really is key; thus ensuring each person has sufficient solo time for self-care activities or just plain old downtime often works wonders. Ultimately, there isn’t always an easy-answer solution since every pair dynamic is unique—no cookie-cutter remedies here! Taking note of these aspects allows us both sides of the story: yours as well as hers which may provide insight into why exactly this tiredness creeps up on you around her presence. A professional stance would suggest taking these observations onboard then communicating openly with your partner about them—bearing in mind that conversation is two-way street—and working together towards understanding why this feeling arises and how both parties might collaborate to solve it ensures mutual satisfaction in the connection moving forward.

With Everything That’s Been Said & Done (Or Alluded To 😬), What’s Next?

Acknowledging Your Feelings

First things first, it’s crucial to acknowledge how you’re feeling. The fact that you’ve noticed this energy shift is important and should not be dismissed. The modern dating scene can be a roller coaster of emotions, and it’s perfectly alright to experience ups and downs. However, when your gut tells you something isn’t quite right, it’s time to listen.

Take some time for yourself and reflect on these feelings. Write down what energizes you in life versus what drains you. Are there specific moments with your girlfriend that feel particularly exhausting? Identifying the patterns might help pinpoint what’s behind this energy drain.

Communication Is Key

Communication is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship. It sounds like now is the moment for some open-hearted dialogue with your girlfriend. Talk about your feelings without placing blame or making her feel attacked – remember, she might be totally unaware of how her presence affects you.

Plan a comfortable and private space to discuss your concerns. Use “I” statements like “I have noticed I feel tired around us lately” instead of “You make me feel drained”, which may help keep the conversation constructive.

Evaluating Lifestyle Changes

Sometimes our bodies react unconsciously to stressors that we aren’t mentally acknowledging. So before concluding it’s all about the relationship, consider any recent lifestyle changes for both of you.

Analyze whether anything has shifted significantly in either of your lives, such as new job pressures, family issues, or health concerns that might be indirectly impacting your interactions with each other.

Consider Individual Self-Care Routines

Maintaining individuality within a partnership is vital for a balanced dynamic. Reflect on whether both of you have been investing enough in self-care.

Encourage each other to pursue personal hobbies and interests that recharge your batteries independently from one another. This practice can often bring fresh energy back into the relationship.

Schedule Quality Time Deliberately

The comfortable stage in relationships can sometimes slip into complacency if we’re not careful. Look at how quality time is spent together – binge-watching series continually might not count anymore.

Plan engaging activities together that involve interaction and new experiences outside your usual routine; breaking out from the norm could reignite that spark.

The Role Of Professional Help

There’s no shame in admitting if something feels beyond just a phase—sometimes external assistance can shine light on blind spots we don’t see.

Consider seeking advice from a counselor or therapist specializing in relationships who could offer insights into why this emotional dynamic has changed between you two.

Making A Joint Action Plan Moving Forward

After discussing everything openly and considering all underlying factors possibly affecting your relationship dynamics, work together with your girlfriend to develop an action plan.

Create strategies for managing energy dips, like setting boundaries around phone use or incorporating more solo downtime into each day — teamwork makes the dream work! Feeling tired around your girlfriend can be a puzzling experience. It’s important to consider various aspects of your relationship and personal health that could be contributing to this sensation. Sometimes, the cause might be emotional rather than physical, indicating that there might be underlying issues within the relationship itself. For example, if you’re in a position where your girlfriend has declared her love for you, it may have put unexpected pressure on you to think about your own feelings and where you stand in the relationship. This kind of emotional processing can be draining. You might find value in exploring feelings around declarations of love as discussed in an article about when my girlfriend said I love you, which could shed light on why such interactions leave you feeling tired. Conversely, if the verbal exchange of affection isn’t as frequent or forthcoming as you’d like, it’s possible that the absence of these affirmations is taking a toll on your energy levels. Knowing how it feels when a boyfriend doesn’t say ‘I love you’ often can help understand if this lack is affecting your state of mind and energy around her; consider reading an article which touches on this specific issue: my boyfriend doesn’t say I love you often. If you encounter conflict in your relationship, it’s also possible that arguments or mean-spirited exchanges are draining. Reflect on whether times when your boyfriend says mean things during fights resonate with your situation; such negativity can certainly lead to exhaustion. When exploring this pattern, a related read could provide some insight: my boyfriend says mean things to me when we fight. Lastly, consider the way routine interactions happen between both of you. Something as mundane as how your boyfriend says goodnight can impact your overall mood and energy levels without even realizing it. For more context on how these daily habits affect relationships, take a look at this piece: when your boyfriend says goodnight. Reflecting on these different scenarios may provide clarity or guidance for understanding why being around your girlfriend leaves you feeling tired and what steps could potentially help alleviate this exhaustion.